SHIT

After 2 weeks of waiting, 3 phone calls to the hospital to get the damn ultrasound results to my Gyno. The nurse just called and said that since the cysts are still on the ovary, they need to do a CA125 test for ovarian cancer. Isn't life great?

I'm really trying not to freak out because my head is telling me it is just normal protocal to rule it out. I wish my heart would understand it. I'm stressed to the max with school, work, and not getting enough rest and now this. Lovely.

I have my Remicade treatment on Tuesday so the nurse will fax the order to my RA doc and they'll take the blood then while taking it for my usual tests. BUT I do know that the RA nurse will call me the next day with my results (she does of all tests) so at least I'll know quickly.

Nothing Much

to report. Still waiting on calls from docs about the cysts and about my coumadin dosage. Both will get phone calls tomorrow morning from a not-too-happy patient. Great docs but I think their staff doesn't do too good of a job carrying out orders. I think patients need to be proactive in their care anyway these days.

I was bad on Friday and had some fresh tomatoes and cucumbers for lunch. I paid the price but it was worth every bite. Sometimes I just have to eat those things. Like my body craves it with every fiber of my being.

Pain has been bad off/on. Yesterday my hips were killing me, but the pain pills helped. No signs of flares this week, so that's something!

Zero to B*tch in 2.9 Seconds

I was feeling OK, in some pain (enough for a pain pill) so I took one. Then a few minutes later, some rotten feelings came over me. Like I could scream and just want to run away. I started to shake too. Nothing happened to provoke it - just happenend. So I took a Xanax and its calming me down. I HATE feeling like this, I really do. I wish I knew what caused it though.

*UPDATE* ummm.... hello... its an anxiety attack!! Its been so long since I've had one that pops out of the blue that I forgot what it felt like. GAH!

My UC has been a rotten bugger the past few days, but seems to be doing better today. I hope it stays that way.

Cysts

I had my follow up ultrasound today on my left ovary. The cysts are still there, although one is slightly smaller (better than bigger!) but its apparent that they're not related to ovulation. I should hear from my doctor sometime next week (hopefully!). She's supposed to get the results by Wednesday.

I know that some cysts are shrunken by using birth control pills, but I can't take them due to the increase risk of blood clots. Which is one of the driving factors behind my partial hysterectomy last year. Hemorrhaging was a huge risk as well as pregnancy (which was unlikely with my history) could have killed me. I was actually on BC constantly for a year (after my blood clot in June 2003) to prevent the hemorrhaging to give me a year to think about the hyster. I was at peace with it, and knew it had to be done. I found out after the surgery that I was full of fibroids as well as endormetriosis (sp? too lazy to look it up!) which the surgeon removed.

So June of 2004, my ovaries were fine. The cysts have formed since then.

Now to wait and see what needs to be done. I'm upset about this - yet one more thing I have to deal with. I'm still trying to stay positive but its hard when I have so many things to deal with. Many others have things worse than I do but this still upsets me. Time for a pity pot day I think, then I should be fine and ready to face what I need to.

Schtuff

My left shoulder has flared. I took it easy yesterday but spent most of it at the computer putting things back together. Not a good idea... but not much choice. I slept for nearly 10 hrs last night, with the ice pack on (fell asleep), and actually didn't move all night. Shoulder is still hurting but flaring down. Pain pills are my friends today!

I finally heard back from the doc's office about my protime tests. I left a message yesterday morning saying, "You're messing with my life here" and that seemed to get some attention! The nurse called me almost immediately to tell my my doc was out of town again. So she was going to ask another doc in the office what to do then called me back yesterday afternoon. He said to take 5 mg coumadin for 4 days a week, then 7.5 mg for 3 days a week. PT was OK, but INR was still a little low. I need to call Dr. B again next week to see what he wants me to do.

Over all I'm feeling really tired and more than the usual exhuastion... but then again I haven't had much sleep for the last week (except last night).

UC has been fine, and blood sugar has bounced around some but hasn't gone below 60.

Results

After a few days of increased coumadin, my protime is finally risen - I don't think it is where it should be though but I'll have to wait to hear from my internist. 15.4 with INR of 1.3. Of course he's out of the office until Friday so I'll call first thing then to find out what he wants me to do. The pain in my legs has finally eased and its very mild so that's a good sign.

My Remicade treatment went fine yesterday. My RA doc checked my knees and hips and there is some swelling in my knee and from moving my knee checked my hip. Pulled just a little in the joint, but most of the pain was soft tissues (in my ass). He said that several patients have been really miserable with the heatwave but its definitely doing better.

My right foot feels like its flaring, or hurts pretty bad today. I'll baby it and put some ice on it when I get home from work.

UC is fine, and my blood sugar has been level - except for last night when I forgot to take a snack with me to my Remicade appt and ended up eating later than normal. It was fine when I went to bed and again this morning.